So my family's ski trip was cancelled on account of "the largest storm in a decade" moving over the entire west coast... projecting to dump over 10' of snow everywhere and have winds over 100 mph at the peak of some mountains. I know that the weather is something uncontrollable and their is no use being upset on account of it, but right now I am really disappointed. I wanted to go on this ski-trip with my family so badly. I have been thinking about it every day for the past three weeks and its been on my heart for a lot longer. I have even been jogging every day just to get that extra bit of performance so I would enjoy less fatigue so I could have more fun with my family.
It just seams like nothing ever works out for us sometimes. The new house, our cars, money, our plans... our family seems plagued because the things we plan for never work out it appears.
What I find that makes me find joy in the darkest of times is when I see that the things we don't plan for that become our best moments to shine. I never planned on coming to APU, and here I am. I never planned on a lot of things, but here I stand. Perhaps this is another moment where God reminds us: let me takes the reigns... or to put it more vibrantly: "I know the plans I have for you, you can trust me because I will always take care of you."
I feel very scared about the future. Not frightened or afraid, but I feel a bothersome worry coming over me. I know that I can trust God, and I know that I do, but I am still uncomfortable. Yet the slightest glimmer of hope keeps me believing, for I know that God has big plans for me, maybe its just not the plans I have for me.
In a separate matter: I am wondering if perhaps I am ready to have a girlfriend again.
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