THIRST

I am thirsty.

thirst:  Poetic/Literary  a strong desire for something.

As I sit here cocooned in music, I am realizing how truly dry I am.  I thirst for so much but my eyes are veiled: I feel like I am in a desert, when in fact I am treading in an ocean.

I thirst for righteousness, true love, for God's kingdom come, for peace, for wisdom, for love, for justice, for freedom, for heaven, for answers, for buried treasure, for blessings, for faith, for intimacy, for life, for adventure, and I thirst to know myself.  I am a man, thirsty for so much, and this thirst manifests itself as much more than hunger pains.  I know what I was made for, my purpose, my amazing calling, but I idly take it for granted, and refuse every cupful that comes my way.

By any definition, we would call a man dying of thirst who refuses a cup of water to be insane.

My thirst has reached an apex, a tipping point: I can no longer ignore the passion of my soul to be righteous and faithful.

I am exhausted with trying to fake my way through relationships, my faith, my work, and life in general.  A moment of honesty for me is a moment of self-recognition, and at times I do not like the whole picture present in the mirror.  But I am confronted with a truth greater than anything power of this world; I am loved without precondition by a God who promises satisfaction to all who thirst.

This past year has been a difficult one for me.  One of asking myself whether or not I truly believe in God, and the answer I have discovered is that I absolutely believe he exists, and that he is involved in the affairs of this world--and this heart.

It should come as no surprise then that I thirst to know more about the Creator.  I know much about his character, but little about his face or his hand.  With little trepidation I sail forward towards springs of freedom, justice, wisdom, and love... hoping that this insatiable yearning can be cured by a God who promises to quench all thirsts.